Thought you had
all the answers
to rest your heart upon.
But something happens,
don't see it coming, now
you can't stop yourself.
For some time, I have wondered how in the world I got to this place. It's easy to fall deep into thought when it's so silent.
The air has that summer mugginess, and were in that sort of..pre-dusk twilight. That's my favorite time of the evening; when the light is most comfortable on the eyes.
I went outside briefly; I wish I was in any mood to stay out longer. I walked out to the garage to get a bottle of water, and I saw the garage door was open. I stepped out onto the driveway for a moment. I was surprised to feel cold air, because the thermometer said 79 degrees. Because I feel like death, I assume my body must also take on death-like qualities, and become numb and frigid.
Not true. I've maintained a steady low grade temperature.
I feel..despondent. But it's a peaceful sort of sadness. Not the violent, weighty, pulling, heavy kind. I've felt that. It feels like something is grabbing your ribs, and pulling as hard as it can, bringing you to your knees.
No, it's definitely not that. But rather, a quiet, almost serene sort of feeling. Almost like sleepiness. I feel as if I will wake up tomorrow, and find that everything is the same.
Unfortunately, that rarely happens. I hate doing that ;waking up from a blissful sleep, only to slowly have everything seep back into your brain like poison.
We bought a new rug for the living room. It feels foreign under my feet.
In the silence,
all your secrets, will
raise their worried heads.
Well, you can pin yourself back together,
to who you thought you were.
Now you're out there living
In the deep.
